12 things to do when you encounter criticism

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Criticism is one of the things that are faced by everyone in different forms. There are always a cluster of people who don’t appreciate your work but get jealous of whatever you do. These people deny your work and try to lower your energy by giving negative comments.

But there are also those people available to you who criticize you for your betterment and improvement. They encourage you by positive criticism to work more in a better way. Because their criticism make us to realize our mistakes. We are not subject master in everything or perfect in specific thing. Their criticism realize us this thing that we are not perfect and can make errors.

Here are 12 things to do when you encounter criticism;

  1. Try to bear critics.
  2. Accept all critics, whether it is negative or positive.
  3. Think about all points.
  4. Understand the point of criticism.
  5. Admit honestly that what you are lacking and where you need a room for improvement.
  6. Avoid making critics as your personal issue. Don’t take criticism to your heart.
  7. Judge yourself in pool of critics.
  8. Realize yourself that you are doing something that is affecting someone to react.
  9. Follow valuable critic, don’t ignore it.
  10. Remember that you are surrounded by both enemies and friends, who are always there to criticize you.
  11. Say thank you to all those who criticize you.
  12. Move ahead and try to fix it.Don’t stop yourself after criticism.

Share with us what you do when you face criticism?

5 Common indicators of Toxic Relationships

relationship

Relationship become toxic when your partner is damaging and harming you emotionally and become extremely toxic when he/she is harming you physically. Sometimes it shows your partner’s dysfunctional behavior.

There are many signs of toxic relationship, but below are 5 common signs of toxic relationships.

  1. Lack of emotional support

Emotional support comes  in various ways. Your tough times makes you to be easy with emotional support from your partner but in toxic relationship you do not expect it from your significant other. Your partner if don’t bother to know your emotions or shows his to you.

2. Lack of  respect

Your partner does not respects you and your opinions. He/she may impose his/her decisions on you whether you agree or not. He may not bother to listen you often on various matters and does not value your experiences, ideas and  point of view. One’s point of view may differ from other but respecting others point of view  and giving him/her space is best thing.

3.  Lack of safety

Feeling of being safe with your partner is important for healthy relationship.To enjoy a healthy and durable connection mature love, you should have a feeling of being safe with other. You feel safe when insecurities in relationship are identified and addressed. Being safe mean you are comfortable with each other. You share your lives matters with one another, may be how bitter or sweet they are.

4.  Lack of interest

Your partner does not shows interest in you or your activities anymore. His/her level of  excitement about you may fell gradually. What you want or expect from your partner or what he/she may want from you is not addressed.

5.  Lack of admiration

Admiration is an essential element of healthy and positive relationship. If your partner does not admires you, it weakens the bond deeply between both of you.

Are you in toxic relationship? What steps you are taking to avoid being yourself toxic in relationship? Share with us.

9 tips to make your life different

9 tips to make your life different

1. Live without any regrets:

Your life can be different if you accept your life whatever it is and  whatever you are.This acceptance makes reduces your stress  and also opens your heart and mind to accept the life whatever it is without any regrets.You should need to accept the reality of  your life.Don’t live in any regressions,that hurts you and stops you to act in gaining what ever you want from your life.

2. Ask how instead of why:

Don’t think that why you are been put to this situation?Why you are been facing hardships?Why i am in this problem?Why this happen to me?

Just think that how you can get out of the hardships?How you can turn your lose in to profit?How you can overcome the evil forces in your life? Find the answers of how and then act accordingly.

3. Avoid negative assumptions:

Don’s assume negative things in your life, not for yourself and not even for others. Don’t judge  yourself as well as others on the basis of negative assumptions.Just look for good in yourself and ignore all the bad’s. And try to fix all the bad’s in your life first.

4. Encourage yourself and others:

Always give a dose of encouragement to yourself and to others who lose their hope.Be courageous to take bold steps in your life in order to reach at the peak of  success.If someone makes you let down, motivate yourself to move ahead and face the life.

5. Accept challenges of life:

Accept all the life challenges that it brings for you. Think that these challenges are like seasons and autumn will pass soon to bring spring of your life.So always open your heart to accept the challenges and put your effort hard to complete these challenges.

6. Stop worrying about the things that  your can not control:

Life brings many situations where those things happens that are not in our control and about that we have never thought.Don’t get worried in such type of situations. Just focus on the things that you can do and that are under your control.

7. Remember  honesty is the best policy:

Always be honest with yourself first.Then try to be honest with your family, friends and others.Do your work with honesty.Buildings whose foundations are made up of truth and honesty never fell down.

8. Avoid making your mind victim of negative forces:

Think positive about every thing even about those things that are negative, try to extract positive points from that.If you not do this your mind easily become victim of negative forces and your power to think positively fades down.

9. Find a meaningful purpose for your life:

Stop thinking on the things that you don’t want from your life.Just focus on the things that you want.Find  a clear purpose of your life, make a plan then act accordingly to get the purpose.Remember that the purpose should be meaningful that grows yourself in life and also help others.

In the end you will see there will be no regressions and no lame excuses remains in your life.

Share how can you make your life different?

“Mend my life!”

“Mend my life!”

Sharing a beautiful poem of MARY OLIVER.

The Journey

One day you finally knew
what you had to do, and began,
though the voices around you
kept shouting
their bad advice—
though the whole house
began to tremble
and you felt the old tug
at your ankles.
“Mend my life!”
each voice cried.
But you didn’t stop.
You knew what you had to do,
though the wind pried
with its stiff fingers
at the very foundations,
though their melancholy
was terrible.
It was already late
enough, and a wild night,
and the road full of fallen
branches and stones.
But little by little,
as you left their voices behind,
the stars began to burn
through the sheets of clouds,
and there was a new voice
which you slowly
recognized as your own,
that kept you company
as you strode deeper and deeper
into the world,
determined to do
the only thing you could do—
determined to save
the only life you could save.

~ Mary Oliver

Credits: Mary Oliver

3 ways to strengthen your motivation

3 ways to strengthen your motivation

Desires and ambitions fuel the motivation.If you lack both you lack motivation too.Your inner self drives you and motivates you to fulfill your desires and achieve your goals, if you have them.You will be persistent, energize and courageous, when you are motivated.

1. Visualization

Having a  clear vision and image of your goals in your mind, make you motivated to work on them.It will pushes your inner power and strength to move towards the direction which can turn your vision into a reality.Visualization strengthens your motivation and enhance your abilities to achieve whatever you want. Having a goal itself motivates you.

Visualization makes your subconscious mind to work with you.So visualize your desires as you have already achieved them, it will strengthen your motivation and add the feeling of happiness and joy.

2. Affirmation

Thinking positively help you to be stay motivated to get success, wherever you want it. Sticking  with a goal and never giving up in any hardship, burns the flame of motivation. Staying positive and  patience gives you positive results and motivates you to do whatever you want.

Avoiding negative statements and repeating positive statements, motivates you that you can do everything and achieve whatever you want.Having a firm believe on whatever you are saying to yourself brings positive results. Say yourself that you can do everything.

3. Inspiration

Getting inspiration from your surroundings, from reading, socializing make you to stay motivated.See for inspiration from your right and left.Read books that strengthens your motivations and develops your urge to achieve the goals faster.

Whenever you think you are procrastinated, try to connect with the people who inspires you, and motivates you.It will help you in overcoming procrastination.

How you strengthen your motivation? Share with us.

 

 

You always have a Choice to Change or to Improve

With the Name of Allah Almighty who is most Gracious and Most Merciful.

You always have a Choice to Change or to Improve

A man sitting on his chair writing his resignation letter. He resigns because he is sick of his present job, he has poor performance, bad working relationships etc. So he look for another chance of job somewhere. A job that he think he can do better then present one.

Another man sitting on his chair writing  and brainstorming about things that make him to improve his present job. And get more from it. He is looking for skills and trying hard to acquire them so that he can improve his job performance.

These both have make different choices. One has decided to change and another one is going to improve.

In our life there are various moments come when we decide to change something for various reasons. On another hand we also stick on something to improve it.

-You go for change to get something better.

-You go for change because certain thing is not working in a way you are dealing with it.

-You go for change because you want it.

-You go for Improvement instead of changing because you think you can do it better with an extra effort.

-There is always a chance of improvement instead of leaving.

-There is always something to improve instead of going for change.

-Improvement itself is a way towards change with broader view.

-Improvement requires your determination.

-You always have to first go to choose to improve yourself, your life, people or system, if it doesn’t works then go for change finally.

-It  requires a lot of patience to get the outcomes of change or improve.

-When change becomes hard go for improvement.

-Sometimes you need change badly than to improve.

-Improving can makes you best of your version.

-However change and improve has its on benefits.

At all its your choice whether you have to change or to improve. Its depends on youre determination, your motivation, your efforts and hard work which you have to go for, You have to fulfill all.

Share with us, what you do? Will you go for change or to improve?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

You have only one life

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All of us come to this earth soon will go back. In this world we are blessed with one life. What we do is all to do in only this one life. It will ends soon on its time. What we do in this life soon become our past. It is not important that life ends soon, important is that how you live it.

What we achieve and what we lose in this one life all depends  on our way of leading our lives. Our attitude and believe make us to hit the rock in our life or to crush and wound ourselves under the rock. To live and enjoy life to the fullest, we should need to make our attitude and believe positive towards life.

When we open our arms to receive our life all smiles, sadness wholeheartedly, then we can live our life to the fullest and enjoy every moment of it.To make our life story enjoyable we have to work on it, we have to believe on our self, we have to take risks, we have to make our self proud for our life.

Take a time from your busy schedule and think for a moment how you are spending your life?Are you wasting your life? Or spending it in hating, regretting, questioning, blaming or complaining?

If you are spending your life in this way then stop immediately, stop blaming and complaining, forgive others and forget all negatives, don’t regret and start smiling and act of gratitude and kindness even for a tiny things happening in your life.  

Life can be beautiful, if you make your eyes to see only beauty of life everywhere even in darkness you can find this beauty.

Life can be easy, if you yourself don’t make it complicated.

Be yourself, world is full of negativity and positivity , try to avoid negative ones. Then see the magic and miracles happening in your life!

 

 

7 ways to get rid of anger Forever

With the name of Allah, Who is most Gracious and most Merciful.

7 ways to get rid of anger Forever

Imagine your personality is it looks like an angry bird or it’s like a calm, cool and peaceful person?

Anger; destructive emotion that kills your talents and productive skills. It harms you in every field of life. Makes you sick in relationships, finance etc. You are not able to make any fruitful decision at that time. At an all it is a killer of yourself, your life and your virtues and your personality over all. Your mental, physical and spiritual health suffers from it a lot.

Whatever a reason behind your anger, it may be family issues, your childhood etc. but I reality no one wants to live with an anger everyone wants to get rid of it. Here are few tips to remove anger from your life forever.

  1. Be aware of your anger:

Become sensible to your feelings of anger. Differentiate your emotions when you are responding normally or angry in certain type of situations. It is awareness moment when you become aware of your anger. Now you know very well of responsible factors of your anger. And become conscious of your anger triggers.

  1. Realize the root cause of anger:

Now you know what make you angry in certain type of situation? Remember any recent situation which made you to lose your temper. Write down everything about that situation. Now go through it and identify the main root cause of anger. Keeping in mind the points that what make you angry at that time; e.g. isn’t it somebody’s words, attitude or surrounding environment (e.g. noise) etc. Know why you become angry? Why you lost your temper? Why you react aggressively? What makes you to behave like that?

Getting answer of these questions from yourself and the situation make you to be aware of the source of anger.

  1. Examine your inner self.

You realize the root cause of your anger now examine yourself internally. Remind yourself anger is an internal emotion that effects internally and externally both. So correct yourself from internal first. Examine your points of adhere beliefs. Take notice of your issues. See the both sides of coin.

For example seeing a somebody always make you to lose your temper. What you have to do is to examine what issue you have with him/her? What type of things in him you dislike? So see the things which can make him likeable to you and to all others. When you notice all things then schedule a time and sit with him and resolve your issue. Realize that it is not something in him which you dislike but it is inside yourself which make you to react with him rudely. So you have to work yourself on first. That’s why old saying suits you that what you think is what you are.

  1. Move away from anger:

Yes it is possible to move away from anger. Imagine that you are stuck in traffic for an hour due to some reasons suddenly and you have a meeting, you come out early but still traffic makes an issue for you to not reach on time. And it makes you to lose temper and become angry with traffic.

So what you should do? First just make yourself calm down. Relax. Notice all the vehicles surrounding you. People inside them also want to reach at their destinations on time. So you are not the only one in this ocean of traffic.

So why you become angry? Why not to concentrate on other positive things? Observing the surroundings. Listening a motivational audio book or again revising your meeting points and informing others that you are stuck in traffic suddenly.

All these things make you to move away from anger and don’t make you to waste your energy, which you can utilize, somewhere.Thinking about alternatives make you to move away from anger.

  1. Don’t hurt yourself with anger, Try to forgive yourself:

Have you ever get anger on yourself? Yes we all have that point come in our life many times. When you are feeling helplessness, when you can’t change things, when you can’t change others, when you have not performed with excellence, when you not do something in a way that you want to do. All these situations are blaming situations which make you to lose your temper on yourself. You blame for everything to yourself as a “failure”, as a “loser”. Why are you hurting yourself because of others?

Stop blaming yourself. Keep in your mind that only you are not responsible for some bad situation, there may be other factors too. So why hurt yourself. Get the lesson and then prepare yourself for every situation. Promise yourself next time you can perform better, again fail don’t get disappointed, don’t lose  temper on yourself just keep trying because every time you learn something new even from worst. Forgive yourself this time too.

  1. Rate yourself on anger index:

On which state of anger you are rate yourself.

State 5: Rage- You totally lost yourself. And do not behave normally, every work you speak and everything you do in this situation is not as you say and do normally. You are out of control.

State 4: Infuriated- You not lost it totally but feel yourself mad. A state where you can still handle the situation and control yourself.

State 3: Anger- Now you are in real anger. Physical symptoms of anger start arousing at that time i.e. mind warm up, heat beat increases etc.

State 2: Frustration- You are in between negligible aggravation and real anger.

State 1: Irk- When anger begins but is suppressible.

State 0: Anger less- Calm, cool, peaceful and quiet. No anger lies inside you.

What level you are at on? Now deal it accordingly.

  1. Help others with their anger:

When someone is angry on you or when you are living with angry ones. Try to help them also to get rid of anger. Don’t deal them with anger too. Realize that there are certain types of situations, associated feelings, beliefs etc. Which make them to lose their temper too.

Tell us how you overcome your anger?

You like this article, give your feedback. And share it with others too to help them to get rid of their anger.

 

77 highly effective negative traits to get rid off

JS

Different words use for describing a trait such as characteristic, feature, unique and distinguishing quality of a person. Somewhere it is described as a unique feature which is blessed by genes. Thus trait gives an image of our personality. It can be a  negative or positive or neutral. And everyone possess it. It is a reflection of our personality that who we are.

Here are few important negative traits from which we have to get rid off in order to be a better person.

  1. Abrasive
  2. Aimless
  3. Argumentative
  4. Agonizing
  5. Amoral
  6. Asocial
  7. Bewildered
  8. Brittle
  9. Callous
  10. Careless
  11. Clumsy
  12. Colorless
  13. Complacent
  14. Childish
  15. Complaintive
  16. Compulsive
  17. Conceited
  18. Cowardly
  19. Crafty
  20. Crass
  21. Critical
  22. Deceitful
  23. Dirty
  24. Dishonest
  25. Disorganized
  26. Disrespectful
  27. Dissonant
  28. Escapist
  29. Envious
  30. Faithless
  31. Extreme
  32. Fanciful
  33. Fawning
  34. Graceless
  35. Greedy
  36. Gullible
  37. Hesitant
  38. Imitative
  39. Impatient
  40. Imprudent
  41. Incurious
  42. Insulting
  43. Inert
  44. Irresponsible
  45. Irritating
  46. Lazy
  47. Mannerless
  48. Mealymouthed
  49. Meddlesome
  50. Negativistic
  51. Narcissistic
  52. One-dimensional
  53. Opportunistic
  54. Oppressed
  55. Over imaginative
  56. Paranoid
  57. Passive
  58. Possessive
  59. Regretful
  60. Ridiculous
  61. Sadistic
  62. Secretive
  63. Selfish
  64. Shortsighted
  65. Suspicious
  66. Thoughtless
  67. Troublesome
  68. Unconvincing
  69. Uncooperative
  70. Undisciplined
  71. Un-creative
  72. Unstable
  73. Unprincipled
  74. Unpolished
  75. Vulnerable
  76. Vindictive
  77. Weak willed

 

 

Review your day

Review your day

Journaling or reviewing your all day activities of the day is a best idea.

Are you a person who reviews on night all day activities? If you are not then you should start to do this, because;

  1. This will tell you about all your mistakes which you have done on day but didn’t realize while doing them.
  2. You then know more about your expended time and energy.
  3. It will tell you that have you completed to-do-list tasks today.
  4. You will get acknowledge yourself about the bad’s and good ones of the day.
  5. You will realize in the end that how you have spent your day and how you can do more to spend your everyday fruitfully.
  6. You will know about the lessons learnt in the day.
  7. You will judge about your communication level that how you have interacted and communicated with others?
  8. You will learn about your life phase where improvement is needed, by recognizing your weak and lacking point of the day.
  9. You will realize your strengths, weaknesses, your struggles in the day and learn that how can you do the best? How can you overcome your weaknesses? Which phase  needs improvement?
  10. What is the new thing that you have learnt today? And how well you have learnt that one? And how you can do more of that?
  11. You can also overview or count the blessings of the day bestowed to you by Allah in a day.
  12. It will also help you in knowing your memorizing ability, in a way that what are the things of the day that you can recall.

Best way to review your day is to VISUALIZE YOUR ALL DAY ACTIVITIES IN 30 sec to 1 min from the point of awakening to the time when you are on bed for sleeping. Review all activities in order and do not jump from sequence. Doesn’t it look like a meditation or a movie running in front of your eyes?

What Benjamin Franklin asked himself every night is; what good have I done today?

 Share in comments how you review your day?

If you like this and enjoy reading, share it with others too.

Thank you O Allah

Thank you O Allah

Thank you OH  Allah, Oh ALLAH The Great

You have created us

You have given us a reason to live

You blessed us with eyes to see, ears to hear, tongue to taste, brain to think, legs to walk, hands to work…

What you have not given us? Nothing is left to ask you to give us, You know our desires our needs, You have given us so much of things and we know the lacking point in our life is also fulfilling by You.

You are the best Oh ALLAH, You are The GREAT.

Thank You Allah for everything

I am nothing but You have given me everything.

I have no  Standard words that fulfill Your level of praise Oh ALLAH,

I am saying YOU thanks for everything, for every blessing in every moment, for my every breath. Thank you ALLAH. Thank you a lot ALLAH.

ALLAH you are The Most Merciful and The Most Gracious, Please forgive us for our every mistake.

Please help us OH ALLAH in our every aspect of life, Oh ALLAH please please fulfill our all legal desires and needs. Help us and make us successful in this world and in the world after that. Amen

Say Amen!